Lola Davidson is a “sex positive” writer who runs Blogger Slut on Tumblr; here is a link to her site:
Q: What inspired you to start your blog?
A: I had a lot of opinions about sexuality and empowerment and I really wanted an outlet to express all that, I started my blog kind of as a public diary of my thoughts, i didnt expect a lot of feedback but I actually got a really great reaction from people, a lot of them were very accepting of what I wrote and asked me questions and struck up conversations with me about it, I’ve met some really interesting people through my blog.
Q: What sort of job do you have and how does it influence your attitude about sex?
A: I’m a student, so it doesn’t affect my attitude too much about sex but it has made me realize a lot about sexual safety, we’ve had a lot of workshops and seminars at my college about the important of consent and respect and feeling sexually comfortable around your partner, mostly my ideas about sex come from my own personal self growth and from watching my friends and people i know with their experiences.
Q: How would you define the word “feminist”?
A: I define “feminist” as any male or female who believes in equality for men and women and acknowledges that we live in a patriarchal society and believes that that should change.
Q: You have several naked pictures of your butt on your website; what motivated you to put them up?
A: Thats actually not me! thats a post I reblogged from another blogger, and i believe her motivation was just that she liked her butt and wanted to post it online. But i do have a bunch of pictures of me on my blog, mostly just to add a personal touch to my blog and so that I wouldnt be this faceless anonymous person behind a computer but actually expose myself in a way i was comfortable with.
Q: Why do you think feminist object to pornography?
A: I think feminists come in all different forms, some object to pornography, some don’t. I think certain people in general object to pornography because it seems demeaning and dominating and just wrong, but I think times have changed and now girls actually want to have sex on camera and thats ok! People assume that those girls dont want to be there or they have daddy issues but that belief in itself is pretty sexist, girls enjoy sex just as much as guys, sometimes more and theyre there because they choose to be.
Q: What is the difference between a porn website and a sex positive website?
A: Well, sex positive websites don’t always include nudity or pornography, they can be sex positive just by words. But I think the main difference between a sex positive website and a porn website is the intention, porn is there for pleasure while sex positive websites are there for education and inspiration. That being said, I do believe that some porn websites can be sex positive. I consider my blog sex positive because I really focus more than just the “penetration” part of sex, I think its really important for girls to feel comfortable with their sexuality and their partners and to not feel forced into acting a certain way or doing certain things to please their partners, I’ve felt that way a million times before. I think its really hard for girls especially to be comfortable with sex because of the pressure put on us to act the way girls are “supposed to act” towards sex and I really want to show other girls who have issues with this that its okay to be sexual, its okay to take charge of your sex life and not fit into a stereotype of what you think a girl is supposed to act like during sex.
Q: Who are some of your favorite bloggers?
A: One of my favorite bloggers goes by the pseudonym “Sugar Tits” (lovesugartits.tumblr.com), she was kind of the main inspiration for me starting my blog, she created this community and safe space for girls of all ages to be open about their sexuality. She has a lot of controversial views, some which i disagree with but her overall message is for girls to feel empowered and respected by the people they’re intimate with.
Q: What do you like about living in San Francisco?
A: I love San Francisco, I really like how liberal and open it is, I grew up going to private catholic schools where being gay was wrong and sex was wrong and it was in a very wealthy area so classism was really prominent, also girls were treated really badly and demeaned a lot, called “sluts”, etc. But what I like most about San Francisco is the resources we have here, there are so many resources about sexual safety, not just STDs but emotional safety too, and the people here are really diverse and interesting and are usually very supportive and non judgmental about your life choices. It’s a great city with a lot of life in it.
Q: What don’t you like about it?
A: Probably the usual cons that come with living in a big city. It can feel unsafe sometimes in certain areas, I’d be lying if i said i didnt look over my shoulder every once in a while waiting for the subway on a late Friday night in the Mission (an area in San Francisco). Being a single girl in San Francisco can be scary sometimes and you run into a lot of disrespectful jerks.
A: Well, I think Hugh Hefner represents everything wrong with the sex industry and is a role model to a lot of anti-feminists so I dont think I’d care for what he has to say. I’d love to have lunch with Gloria Steinem because I have so much respect for her. I’d love to talk with her on her views about pornography though, I remember her saying in an article that it was “dominating” and I’d love to share my opinions on that, she’s been openly accepting towards Erotica, which I consider to be a certain genre of pornography. Specifically Erotic Literature. Also I think the porn industry has changed drastically in the last few decades so I’d like to hear her opinion on that.
Please note; Eliza’s interviews are done by email. All answers are unedited and come right from the lovely fingertips of her subjects:)